New Year

Here we are again, New Year's Eve, cozied up at home in front of Bridget Jones's Diary, sea weed mask on, stuffed with Subway and chocolate milk. Do I know how to party or what? I started out the year alone and remain that way, but I think, if I don't try to force it, I am happy. Happy alone, doing what I want, when I want.

I have joined a boot camp, got a piercing I have wanted for ages, lost a dearly loved cousin, got my first tattoo for said cousin, got a wake-up call at work, got strep yet again, spent too much money on art and myself, started getting regular massages, started eating healthier, fell off that wagon and then got back on (several times), picked up a guy in a bar and had a true one night stand (no last names or phone numbers), fell quickly in love and forced myself out of it for my own good (with two different men), bought myself the camera I have been lusting after for 5 years, started nurturing my green thumb and the consequential orchid collection, got proper curtains and mirror, expanded my typewriter collection, took several solo road trips...

I figure if I start writing more frequently, aiming for daily, it will help me see how good my life is and be happier alone. I realize when I'm around people for too long, I prefer being alone. I can have noise or quiet, whichever I prefer. Groups seem to always be forcing you to have the best time, even if you aren't feeling it. I wonder if that's a symptom of the depression or an effect of spending so much time alone? Is it a healthy, normal feeling? Is there any such thing as a normal way to feel? Is it just aging that is changing my personality? I think I used to have a lot more fun in groups and chaos. Lately, I just want to chill out and read a book or watch TV.  Is that me becoming antisocial and a shut in? Do I need to get a cat?

I think Moulin Rouge is the next film on the New Year's docket.

I found the archive of the Julie/Julia Project, read a bunch until the archive cut off around February. Maybe I should pick one of my cookbooks and work through it like she did. Pick a healthy one, so at least I will be helping myself, instead of eating pounds of butter and gallons of cream like Julie. I have several to choose from. Thought for tomorrow, first day of a new year.

I can't move my face... it may be time to wash this off...

Don't know if the slight burn is from the mask or from the washing...

One of my biggest goals for this year is to go to all the art openings and galleries I can. Red Deer might be tapped out quite quickly, but I have friends and cousins in Edmonton I can stay with if I want to do a weekend of gallery hopping around Jasper Ave and the university.

Damn,  that mask may sting a bit at first, but my skin is damned soft. On to Bridget Jones - Edge of Reason.

I really need to clean my house properly. I have 3 garbage bags to donate, a bunch of cardboard boxes to recycle, and too much shit to organize. I think that's on the agenda for tomorrow. Empty everything into the garbage, recycling, or the back of Alice to take to the donation bins. Clean up the whole kitchen. Go through the spare closet and put everything in the laundry room.

Maybe I should get on this now...

Ok, that's the entirety of the stream of consciousness for tonight. We shall resume tomorrow. Let the cleaning and organizing commence!

A